This is my most recent picture with my boyfriend Larry. We were at a Danny Gokey concert in Vineland.
There’s no secret that I love my boyfriend. I talk about him constantly to anyone who will or won’t listen. If you haven’t heard about my boyfriend by now, you must be living under a rock. He’s pretty great. He makes me really happy and is my best friend. He’s also taught me a lot of important life lessons. Here are 5 of my favorite lessons I learned from my boyfriend.
1. Don’t rush anything. My boyfriend and I never rushed anything with out relationship. I’ll admit that sometimes it took some getting used to on my end. Prior to meeting my boyfriend I had 3 or 4 failed relationships. They never lasted long and everything happened so quick it often felt like a blur. Things were different with my boyfriend. We started talking in May of 2014. We took our time to get to know each other and become friends. We met online and didn’t meet in person or have our first date until September 1st. Things went great and we continued to see each other, but we didn’t make things official until the end of our third date and we didn’t share our first kiss until our 5th or 6th date.
Some people have asked us about our future plans. We definitely see ourselves making a future and being together for a very long time — but at the same time there’s no rush. There’s no need to rush through our lives. We need to take it one step at a time…which leads me to my next life lesson learned through my boyfriend…
Larry and I at Freightland in Delaware. It was so cold that night.
2. Live in the moment. I can be really bad at this. I focus a lot on my past and bad things that happened and I focus a lot on the present and the future I want to create. I have a really hard time living in the present and enjoying the current moment and taking it for what it is. My boyfriend helps me to stay grounded and focused on the present. When I get too negative thinking about the past he reminds me we’re in a new year with a new fresh start — the past needs to stay where it belongs — in the past. As for the future? We’ll definitely get there, but there’s no need to rush. We need to take time to enjoy this present moment, too. It only comes once.
This was our first picture as a official couple, hours after leaving Wheaton Village.
3. Life is too short. I don’t mean to be depressing, but for as long as I can remember I wanted to die very young. The thought of living a day past 50 horrified me. (Mom I apologize ahead of time for bringing this up again. Lord knows you’ve yelled at me hundreds of times for saying this). I was very close with all of my grandparents and watching them grow old and die was heartbreaking and not something I ever wanted to go through or put my loved ones through. Dying young and suddenly seemed to be the solution.
But when I met my boyfriend my views started to change. I began to see that life is actually really short and moves too fast. We need to appreciate every moment and enjoy it all and not rush for death. I’ll never forget my boyfriend and I’s third date (mainly because it’s the day we became official, but that’s another story). We went to Wheaton Village and were walking around and being silly, acting like the two big kids that we are and having a really great time. I told him, “This is what I love about you. You love to have fun. Everyone else says I’m immature when I want to have fun and that I need to grow up.” And he just looked at me and said, “Life is too short. You should have fun.” I never forgot that.
Larry and I in Smithville right before Christmas.
4.Absence makes the heart grow fonder. I’ll be the first to tell you two things: 1. Absence sucks. 2. Distance sucks. But as much as I hate to admit it, absence really does make the heart grow fonder. My boyfriend and I don’t live very close to each other. He lives in Quinton and I live in Washington Township…it’s around an hour away. Due to our work schedules, we normally only see each other just once a week. Because we can’t see each other as often as we’d like, the time we do spend together becomes more special. We always get so excited when we see each other. If I’m seeing him on Saturday I often struggle to fall asleep on Friday because I get too excited to sleep. I’m like a kid on Christmas.
My boyfriend is a truck driver. Currently, he’s training and has to do 275 hours of driving. It should take about a month and a half. He’s been gone for two weeks and I miss him so much. Sometimes I call him and just cry. It’s very hard and I miss him so much. And I still have several weeks to go before I can see him again. But I know that the next time I see him will be the best time I’ve ever seen him. I’ll hug him a little tighter, kiss him a little harder, and love him even more. I’ve already warned him I’ll probably tackle him when I see him next. Being away from each other for so long will just make us appreciate each other and our time together more even more.
Another picture of Larry and I in Smithville
5. Honesty is the best policy. My relationship with my boyfriend has always been founded on honesty. It’s not always easy to come clean and be honest about our lives, where we’ve been, where we are now, but it’s a necessity. I won’t go into details, this is for us to worry about. But there’s been nights when we first got together where I really opened up to my boyfriend, poured my heart out, and became outright vulnerable. I had to ask for forgiveness of past mistakes, and my boyfriend was more than willing to give it to me, no questions asked. The fact that we can be open and honest with each other has allowed us to build trust and become even closer to each other.
And not only are we honest about our relationship with each other, but with others as well. We met online, and though he’s not the first person I dated online, this is the first time I can come out and say “Yes, I met my boyfriend on OKCupid.” Because as my boyfriend taught me, why hide it? There’s nothing to hide or be ashamed of with it. In 2015, is it really worst to meet your significant other online than in a bar? We never did anything wrong meeting online. Was it risky? Yes, it was, but so are all relationships. I just know that OKCupid is what helped me meet my best friend and the love of my life.
Larry and I at the Newsboys concert in October. This was one of my favorite dates. I told him I was in love with him that night.
6. There is no “I” in “Team”. My boyfriend taught me to view our relationship as a team effort right from the get-go and I’ve always loved that. He always said we’re teammates and we work together to love and support each other — and we’ve always done a great job with that. We’ve never really had an argument. We work through life’s trials and tribulations together as a team.
I told him I was thinking about getting a cochlear implant in the end of September. We’ve been dating for about two weeks at the time. I was implanted in November, after being together for just two months. He’s been there every step of the way. Even when I had stitches in my head, was too dizzy to walk, couldn’t stay awake for more than a half hour at a time, couldn’t hear anything, and couldn’t wash my greasy hair for 10 days, he was still supportive, loved me, and told me I was beautiful. I had to heal for a month before being activated and couldn’t hear. I didn’t want to go out or do things and I couldn’t listen to music or watch movies. I wasn’t much fun, but we still made it work. He was patience, loving, understanding, and an amazing team player.
Now it’s my turn. He’s away for training for his new truck driving job with Werner. I have to be understanding of him being away for long periods of time including holidays like Valentine’s Day. It’s hard, but I know in the end it will be worth it — this is his career and his future and it makes him happy. Some days I get really emotional, but I try to support him the best that I can and I let him know that I’m proud of him and I support him and can’t wait to have him back home. We are a team and we’re in it all together.
Larry and I at a Halloween party at his Aunt’s house. We dressed up as teammates… You can’t see it too well but our shirts match. I’m Apple Sauce and he’s Awesome Sauce (our nicknames for each other). I was number 13 (the date we started dating… September 13th) and he was 75 (Sometimes we say 14375 or 14355 to each other… 14375 is “I love you Awesome Sauce” and 14355 is “I love you Apple Sauce”. )
My boyfriend is the greatest man I ever knew. On Friday, the 13th we will have been together for 5 months — my longest relationship ever (also his, but it’s been his longest relationship since month 2 lol). He’s taught me a lot in these past 5 months and I know we’ll learn many more important life lessons together in the next days, months, and years we spend together.